Self-Quarantine with a Big Family
Schools are shut down, our jobs have shifted to remote work-from-home options, and life as we know it is on hold for an indefinite amount of time. Before COVID-19 shut down business as usual, four of our children attended elementary school and an after-school-care program and our youngest attended preschool and daycare. It has been a shift for me and my spouse to not only work at home together, but to do so with all five children (and our two dogs) to care for.
What are our tips and tricks for working from home with a big family?
1. Make activities accessible.
During our work day, we make sure that the kids have independent activities in various rooms. This gives our children the ability to choose their own parent-approved activities. The art room is fully stocked with Crayola modeling clay, origami paper, as well as basic supplies such as tape, scissors, paper, and drawing supplies (such as crayons, markers, colored pencils, paints, and paint brushes). The playroom has a train table, a television that can be controlled with Chromecast, and toys for our younger children such as Duplos and Magnatiles. Our basement has an indoor basketball hoop, Legos, and children’s chapter books.
2. Clean as you go.
It does seem like it would be easiest to let the kids figure it out and let the house go, but, with so many people working in such a confined space, it is especially important to tidy messes as they are made. This allows parents to have defined workspaces and virtual meetings without (as many) interruptions from the children. Additionally, this curbs the amount of work that needs to be done after logging off work in the evening. It is exhausting as parents to finish a work day and start on cleaning the house in order to make dinner, then walk the dogs and do the bedtime routine.
3. Schedule the important things.
This varies by families and children – some kids or parents need more of a schedule, while others prefer not to box in their time. I prefer schedule blocking – blocking out chunks of time for electronics, such as who can use the Chromebook or tablet for online learning activities from their school (scheduling turns), or the times they can play the Nintendo Switch. This eliminates the fights I don’t want to have every day, such as, “I want a turn on the Chromebook!” or “Can we play videogames now?” I also schedule what time we have meals and snacks so the kids can’t bum for food all day.
(Note: we make sure that all the kids eat as much as they need/want during the scheduled meal times, but with so many kids and dogs, it is impossible for us to have an open kitchen without being constantly interrupted all day.)
4. Anticipate the challenges.
Do your kids spend all day whining over snacks or bickering over board games or crying over Legos? Figure out ways to alleviate these challenges, either by establishing ground rules or putting away frustrating activities. Sometimes this can be done by making certain activities more accessible, by scheduling times they can participate in those activities, or by putting these activities away until after the work day is over or reserving them for the weekends.
The second part of this is accepting that there will be challenges. The best planned day can fall apart if naptime doesn’t happen or a big project comes up at work. Becoming upset or exceptionally frustrated will not help – take a breath. Figure out what the next step you need to take is to get your tasks done.
5. Communicate.
In a household with so many people, communication is key. My spouse and I both communicate upcoming blocks in our schedule when we will be unavailable to help with the children, whether that is a meeting or recording lectures. This way, there is no frustration when we need extra support from each other.
Remember, this is a stressful, unusual time for you, your spouse, and your children. The challenges faced today are not the challenges we expected to face a month – or two months – ago. It is okay to extend grace. It will get better. Not today, not tomorrow, and maybe not soon, but together we will get through this.
What are some fun games for kids?
- Catan Junior
2-4 players, ages 6 and up. - Monopoly Deal
2-5 players, ages 8 and up. Fast-paced, fun card game. - Monopoly Empire
2-4 players, ages 8 and up. This game is a fast-paced version of Monopoly that plays more like Sorry – very fun for the whole family. - Phase 10
2-6 players, age 7 and up. Longer game play (can be shortened). Fun card game. - Sequence for Kids
2-4 players, ages 3-6 years old. Fun, easy to learn game for kids. - Stratego
2 players, ages 8 and up. My kids started playing this game at 7-years-old. - Tiles Rummy
2-4 players, ages 8 and up. Slightly confusing when teaching the rules, but fun for the whole family once game play starts! - Trouble: Olaf’s Ice Adventure
2-4 players, ages 5 and up. This one is really fun! Involves ice and salt.
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